When someone dies, we can never deny the fact that we feel that we lose a part of ourselves. We always feel pain and loss and we mourn the passing of someone we love. Some of us go through shock and disbelief while some go on and continue with funeral planning as if nothing has happened. But nevertheless, when someone dies, in time we will all go through grief. And to better understand our emotions, let us talk about the stages of grief and how we can get through it. In summary, these are the five stages of grief.
- Denial – “Really? Is he really dead? “We do not immediately acknowledge the fact that we have a dead loved one since facing this reality would hurt too much. That is why we resort in toning down the situation.
- Anger – “Why did he even die? This is not fair!” Rage is usually the feeling after denial, once the situation of someone’s loss sinks in to us; the sudden gush of emotions is too much to handle that why this emotion emerges.
- Bargaining – “I would do anything just to be with him again” Hope later on emerges after anger. We also sometimes think that there could have something that we should or would have done before our loved one died.
- Depression – “I’m so sad, I feel desperate!” understanding death and feeling helpless about it leads to depression.
- Acceptance – “it’s okay, we all have to move on. I believe he’s in a better place right now.” After being depressed, most of us come to terms with reality and loss. We achieve a breakthrough and we now can work with the situation of loss.
Understanding the stages of grief that you are in lets you be in control with your feelings and emotions. It helps you understand yourself and the situation that has just happened. But most importantly, it helps you heal.
One funeral quote by Mandy Hale that is in line with grieving is this: “Whatever you’re facing today, keep going. Keep moving. Keep honing. Keep pressing on. There’s victory on the other side!”