What to Include in a Memorial or Visitation Service

Why These Moments Matter

A memorial or funeral visitation doesn’t need to follow a script. There’s no standard template. No right way to do it.

But when it’s done well, it creates space — for grief, for memory, and for connection.

Some families keep it quiet and simple. Others bring food, photos, and a slideshow that makes people laugh through their tears. The format doesn’t matter as much as the feeling. And that comes from what you choose to include.

If you’re planning a memorial or funeral visitation and aren’t sure what goes into it, this guide can help.

What’s the Purpose of a Memorial or Visitation?

Unlike a structured funeral service, these gatherings tend to be more flexible. There’s often no funeral casket present. Sometimes the burial or cremation has already happened.

The purpose is less about tradition and more about togetherness.

A funeral visitation is usually held before the funeral service, giving guests a chance to offer condolences and share memories in a quieter setting.

A memorial can happen days, weeks, or even months after a loss. It gives people time to travel, reflect, and participate in a way that feels less rushed.

Both formats are about remembering — not just the loss, but the life.

Key Elements You Can Include

What you include depends on the tone you want to set. Here are some of the most common — and meaningful — additions:

  • Photos: Printed images, poster boards, slideshows, or digital frames. 
  • Poems or Readings: Funeral poems, quotes, song lyrics, or short stories. These don’t need to be religious unless that fits. Some of the most touching moments come from a simple line that meant something to them. 
  • Eulogies: A friend, partner, or family member can share reflections or tell a story that brings the room together. 
  • Music: Background playlists, live acoustic performances, or selected songs for specific moments. 
  • Food and Drink: From light refreshments to full meals — food has a quiet way of helping people feel at ease. 
  • Memory Tables or Keepsakes: More on that below. 

Some families also display the funeral casket at a visitation, depending on timing and personal choice. Others place an urn with photos, candles, or flowers nearby.

How to Shape the Flow

Even a relaxed gathering benefits from gentle structure.

Here’s a sample timeline many families follow:

  1. Welcome or opening words from a family member, celebrant, or clergy 
  2. Music or slideshow 
  3. Readings or funeral poems 
  4. A eulogy or personal reflections 
  5. A moment of silence 
  6. Time for guests to share stories (optional) 
  7. Closing words 
  8. Food and mingling 

Funeral directors can help you manage the timeline, so you’re not carrying that responsibility while trying to grieve.

Creating a Story Through the Details

The most powerful funeral services feel personal — not just polished.

Think about what made them unique:

  • Were they lighthearted or quiet? 
  • Did they love jazz, gardening, or motorcycles? 
  • What did people always say about them? 

Reflect those things in small details — the music, the colors, the quotes. Maybe it’s a dish they always made, or a favorite hat placed on the memory table.

Sometimes the most meaningful funeral arrangements are the ones with the most heart, not the biggest budget.

Keepsake Ideas and Memory Tables

Memory tables help people connect in ways that feel natural.

Common items include:

  • Photo albums 
  • Favorite books or worn-out tools 
  • Hobbies or crafts they were known for 
  • Quotes or printed funeral poems 
  • Candles or small mementos 
  • A guestbook or “memory jar” where visitors can leave notes 

Some families offer take-home keepsakes. Bookmarks. Seeds. Magnets. Printed obituaries with a photo and quote. These small pieces often end up on fridges and nightstands — reminders that live on quietly.

Planning Ahead Helps More Than You Think

Some families choose to pre-arrange these elements as part of their funeral preplanning. It takes the burden off loved ones later and ensures the service reflects the person it’s meant to honor.

In your funeral preplanning conversation, you can specify whether you’d like a memorial, visitation, or full funeral service. You can even choose which funeral poems you’d like read or what kind of music should play.

If you’re someone who wants to shape your story in advance, this option might bring peace of mind.

How Tranquility Funeral Services Can Help

At Tranquility Funeral Services, we support families from planning through to the final goodbye.

That includes:

  • Helping you choose between a visitation, memorial, or full funeral service 
  • Coordinating speakers, music, and timelines 
  • Setting up keepsake displays and memory tables 
  • Writing or printing obituaries and tribute materials 
  • Supporting any part of the funeral arrangements, including casket or urn decisions 

Whether you’re planning something now or thinking about funeral preplanning for the future, our team of experienced funeral directors is here to help — with no pressure and no assumptions.

Speak with a planner or request our visitation guide to learn more.

Even small details can help a service feel more like them. We’ll help you bring those pieces together.

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Hallelujah (Leonard Cohen)

Well I’ve heard there was a secret chord That David played and it pleased the Lord But you don’t really care for music, do you? Well, it goes like this: The fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift The baffled king composing Hallelujah

Hallelujah (4x)

Well your faith was strong but you needed proof You saw her bathing on the roof Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew ya She tied you to her kitchen chair And she broke your throne and she cut your hair And from your lips, she drew the Hallelujah Read more

Goodbye My Lover (James Blunt)

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
‘Cause I saw the end before we’d begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.

So I took what’s mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won’t stop there,
I am here for you if you’d only care. Read more

“Even Now” performed by Linda Eder

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/sciOVgqIE9U/hqdefault.jpgEven now…I remember all the empty spaces
You filled with love
Even now…Every corner of the world we shared
Is still filled with love
Even now…not a day goes by
When I don’t ache for you
Through my tears I still hear your laughter even now Read more

“Dear John” performed by Styx

https://img.discogs.com/6TqmE1aO98VGTepHIi07azN-M8c=/fit-in/300x300/filters:strip_icc():format(jpeg):mode_rgb():quality(40)/discogs-images/R-8817727-1469403072-7027.jpeg.jpgDear john I knew you
About as well as anyone
We were the wild ones
So sure those days would never end
Now they’re only memories my friend

Dear john I’ll see you
Someday again

I swear I saw you
On a crowded street today
I almost called your name
Thinking of all those yesterdays
Heaven help me
How I miss my friend

Dear john I’ll see you
Someday again

There’ll be a celebration
When all will be revealed
We’ll have a reunion
High on a hill

Dear john how are you
God know it’s heaven where you are
Find some peace there
May it never end

Dear john my heart knows
We’ll meet again
Dear john I’ll see you….
Someday again

 

Unlike many songs about death, “Dear John” seems to have a happy mood. The song starts with guitar strumming at a light and lively tempo and the Styx sung it just like they would sing a happy country song. Why is that? The singer was singing about the way he is missing his dear friend John who have just passed away. His memory of John is so much still alive that he felt he has seen John among the crowds and even called his name only to realize that he is only just imagining it. The song has a sprightly tempo because the singer knows that someday he will again see John and spend time with him. This sounds like the Christian doctrine of the resurrection when the two will meet again ‘high on a hill.” The singer also assumes that John is now happily residing in heaven where all his problems and stresses are all gone. This happy and hopeful thought is reflected in the way the song was performed by the Styx. There are more funeral songs that celebrates life at www.songmeanings.net. If you plan to sing songs for an upcoming funeral service, this is the site that you need to visit.

“Can You Hear Me When I Talk to You?” performed by Ashley Gearing

Time passes by so quickly
But I guess I thought you’d be here forever
I never even had the chance
To say goodbye
There’s so many things to tell you
Left unsaid until now

Can you hear me when I talk to you
Do the words I say ever make it through
Can you hear me when I talk to you
Cause I’d give anything if I just knew Read more